I’m Baaaaack!

It’s been 2 years since Sandy (to the day!!), and after rebuilding our house, my business, and so much in between, I’m finally at a point where I’m officially reopened for business! It’s been long and I’m super pumped to get back into the swing of things! I’m (almost) settled in – stay tuned for more pictures of my new studio. I absolutely love it:) Though I’m taking my time to find the perfect finishing touches, it’s a dream!

Check out my Mbellishd blog to see what’s new, and to hear about sales and more!

Untitled-1

Rebuilding Post Sandy

As many of you know, my home was ruined during the infamous Hurricane Sandy. Although we made it out ok our house had to be rebuilt. (Luckily my hubby is an architect!) Along with the home that drowned, a lot of the stock I had from my accessories company Mbellishd went with it. Anything that so much as looked at the water, I tossed. That, in conjunction with moving twice in the interim (once from the old house to my mother-in-law right after, then somewhere else until we moved back home) and being my own decorator for the new house, maintaining constant watch on the sub-contractors etc., took nearly all the time I had. Though I kept up Mbellishd, I couldn’t give it my full focus.

Well, we are back at home, getting more settled with each passing day, and I am in the midst of putting together my new studio!! Here is a picture of the shelving that was just installed. I love love love my grey-stained floors against the pink walls!

10622783_10205146740131294_6324067423649570281_n

Now that the shelving is in, I will decide on desk shape and room decor. Stay tuned for pics of my developing studio and finally of my new stock :) I can’t wait to share it all!

Follow my blog to see Mbellishd’s progress here. And join my Mbellishd Facebook page for more pics!

My New FB Group Geared For Singles

Hi all!

So, many of you have been following my previous posts on my view of shidduchim and how I try to help. I’ve received a lot of new “profiles” and some fresh people to work with. (If you’d like to send me your info please read my previous posts and send to letsmakeashidduch@gmail.com.)

While working with large organizations’ matchmaking sites, I began to grow frustrated at how they run their sites. It pains me that singles have to pay for membership (although I totally understand real websites need to pay for overhead). And although I do understand the need for a matchmaker or go between to make things less awkward, I believe it can work wonders if singles themselves have access to others so they can decide on their own if something seems interesting. I’ve set up a Facebook group called Let’s Make a Shidduch that gives singles such access. I am available to act as an intermediary if a single prefers it.

Here is what I write as part of my group info. Feel free to request to join but please read everything first! And this is for singles only!

——————————————————————————————————–

I created this group as an opportunity for singles to possibly find their match on their own. Singles have to be approved by me first. I will try to make sure the single is legit, normal (they must provide me with their “resumes” or information etc BUT I BEAR NO RESPONSIBILITY-PLEASE DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH BEFORE YOU GO OUT ON A DATE!! This group is geared to modern orthodox-yeshivish as I am most familiar with this spectrum.

Once a single is approved they are free to look through other singles in the group and politely approach them, as in a regular matchmaking site. Be aware that if you join the group, you are making yourself available to anyone else part of the group. If I get any complaints about an individual, I will promptly remove them.

I will also be posting basic snippets of information of singles I know/have information of (without names etc). If something sounds intriguing for you just let me know and I can possibly set it up for you and/or give you more information.

I am a “shadchan”-in quotes because although I am involved in shidduchim, I am not like an old-fashioned shadchan. I believe (and have been told) I have a fresh, sensitive take on singles, and how I work with them. I am honest and expect honesty and decency in return. That includes responding to me or the single who may have contacted you in a timely manner.

I am available to mediate if someone feels more comfortable to go through me. My email is letsmakeashidduch@gmail.com. Feel free to contact me.

If someone in the group finds an individual who may be better suited for someone they know who isn’t part of the group feel free to contact me.
Any feedback, dates and marriages please let me know!

Any shidduch that comes from this group I dedicate in honor of Gil-ad, Eyal and Naftali, the 3 boys murdered in Israel.

 

Now I Need the Girls!

Although my fingers feel heavy, my stomach feels queasy and my mind is thick with thoughts of the 3 boys Eyal, Gil-ad and Naftali, innocent children brutally kidnapped and murdered by Hamas, I push myself to try to help a fellow Jew. I dedicate this post in their honor. Even if no shidduch comes about from trying, may your efforts be an aliyah for their nashamot.

———————————————————–

Thanks so much for all the personal messages I received supporting me in doing my share to help singles.

In my last post (find it here), I requested specifically for people to pass on information about guys they know who are single as I was short on guys. I am happy to say I have received a nice amount of guys (yay!) to work with so I am really accepting info on ALL girls and guys you know! To be more direct, I am most familiar with and have worked with modern orthodox to yeshivish types and anything within that spectrum. Again, I ask of you all, think of people maybe a step further than your immediate circle, friends siblings, co-workers, boss’s child, child’s friend’s siblings. You NEVER know how it will come about. The shidduch I made came about after randomly meeting a stranger on the Brooklyn College campus who knew someone for someone I knew and the rest is history;)

Feel free to forward infos + pic to letsmakeashidduch@gmail.com. Feel free to contact me with any questions as well.

Please make sure there is a contact number to the single (or go-between) and a brief description of what the person is about, how they see themselves religiously and what type of person they are looking for. This helps me differentiate one from another as simple technical details do not help in me understanding what they’re about.

I really try to be non-judgmental, to understand each person’s needs, listen well to their requests in what they are looking for and how they describe their hashkafot.

Thanks so much!

 

PS I am working on something that will allow singles themselves to peruse through other singles out there and possibly help someone find their bashert on their own. I will be available to do the communication at first if they feel more comfortable that way. Details to follow!

Shidduchim and How YOU Can Help

As some of you may know, I’ve been actively involved in Shidduchim for many years. I’ve made one Shidduch so I know I can do it again :)

Unfortunately, my list trails with girls. And although I’ll accept any girl’s info, I’m truly seeking your help to find guys for my girls, ranging from Modern Orthodox to Yeshivish.

SO, I created an email just for shidduchim. Please feel free to send questions, profiles, and pictures to letsmakeashidduch@gmail.com.

My biggest pet peeve is when I get information that reads like a job resume, with all the technical details but without any description of the single as a person– I cannot help you if all I know is his/her camp, bungalow colony, references, and whether or not he or she was valedictorian. I don’t know the person from a hole in the wall, so if you’re coming to me for help I need to know whether the single is an atheist, conservative, Yeshivish, learning, wears skirts, pants, or turbans. I exaggerate, of course, but you get the idea. The more I read about you (not too long, save that for the date!) the better feel I get.

So please be sure there is a paragraph on what you or the single is looking for type-wise, hashkafically, religiously. Also, I need pictures. If you’d like me not to share them, please specify, but I need to see what you look like. It helps me remember you as I’m a visual person.

—————————————-

There is really so much I’d love to discuss on this topic but I’ll rein myself in (or try;)) and concentrate on how we can help the singles who remain after the initial burst of engagements post high school/seminary/college.

For many, “Shidduchim” means excitement, a whirlwind of fun and joy – but for many, many others, it connotes loneliness, judgment, and hardship.

Although I didn’t get married late myself, I feel a super strong connection with and sympathy for singles in our community, who leave weddings happy for their friends but with sadness in their hearts. For once their friends are married, and many begin having children, these singles are left behind in the dust. It’s very difficult to live in a community where laughing kids and a husband to link your arm into are the norm when you have neither.

And here’s the biggest problem:

So many times I’ve asked people if they know any guys – or even girls – whom I can set up with a particular person, and the expression of not only lack of effort but interest breaks my heart. I cringe when right off the bat they say they don’t know anyone.

No, a name may not come to mind immediately. But pause for a minute. Think of your neighbor, your son’s friend, your co-worker’s daughter.

It’s a regrettable truth that once people gets married, they tend to forget how hard it is to be single. Marriage, kids, life keeps us all busy. I know that personally. I don’t think anyone is intentionally thoughtless.

And of course there are people who focus their time and energy on other wonderful endeavors – collecting for the less fortunate, making rounds in hospitals, etc. – and Kol HaKavod to them. If they can’t concentrate full time on Shidduchim, that’s understandable.

 

we-need-you

 

But it would be really amazing if people stopped for just a minute, thought about the singles they might possibly know, and passed those names on to someone who does focus on setting people up. It’s all about connections.

And singles out there, please don’t be shy about asking for yourselves. It’s uncomfortable, awkward, and maybe you feel embarrassed. But do it for no one else but yourselves. You never know when you may hit the jackpot.

SO EVERYONE I NEED YOUR HELP!!

Please take a moment: if you’re not single or looking, think of your friend’s brother, sister, neighbor, Shul member, cousin’s kid. You never know.

Send me names, profiles, and pictures, and maybe we can work some magic!

Thanks everyone!

~Devorah

Yom Ha’atzmaut and My Sister’s Fascinating Blog

Image

Israel’s Independence Day is celebrated on the fifth day of the month of Iyar, which is the Hebrew date of the formal establishment of the state, when members of the “provisional government” read and signed a Declaration of Independence in Tel Aviv. The original date corresponded to May 14, 1948.

In honor of Yom Ha’atzmaut, Israel’s Independence Day, which falls out today, and yesterday’s Yom Hazikaron, Day of Remembrance for the Fallen Soldiers of Israel and Victims of Terrorism, I would like to share my sister Chanie (Susana) Scheiner’s amazing blog called Israel Unlocked.  Sometimes it is down due to editing.

Chanie so eloquently and articulately takes the issues of the Arab-Israeli conflict of years before to current times, and helps her readers understand the root of the matter. As an attorney she shares not only her personal views, but also international laws pertaining to the situation.

I love the tagline of her blog:

“The truly righteous don’t complain about ignorance; rather, they add wisdom.” – Rav Kook

She believes, as do I, that it’s crucial to share, learn, discuss and most of all be knowledgeable about all that is Israel. For people who stand with Israel, especially Jewish people who absolutely should (my views on that are worth another post here:)) the more educated we are, the better we can stand up for ourselves be it physically and verbally.

Please feel free to share her blog, comment and share your views or ask questions-she is very well versed in a lot of the difficult issues of the conflict. In her words:

“I encourage civil discourse on the topic and I’m open to comments, questions, and suggestions concerning this blog or the conflict.”

 

Here is a direct link to pages of legal analysis of the conflict which is simplified for the lay person;)

 

Her latest post:

Cruelty or Compassion? You Be the Judge

———————-

To end, I would like to say that I am ever so grateful to the IDF who put themselves in harm’s way to allow the freedom for Jews and other people to visit and live in the beautiful Land of Milk and Honey. From all the way in America:

AM YISRAEL CHAI!

Review: Macadamia Natural Oil Deep Repair Masque

Image

Aliza, we did not use the mask here

My daughter is 7 years old and she has a beautiful head of curls-so I say. According to her, straight hair is the way to go. Although I try to show her the beauty in it and explain that when she’s older she’ll have the option of wearing it straight or curly, it’s difficult for her to accept  since 95% of girls in her class have stick straight, no frizz hair. One of the biggest difficulties in having a daughter with pretty curly hair is that while she longs to brush it all the time (she’s very girly, sigh) I make sure she only does so while her hair is wet, straight after her shower. Which brings us to the actual brushing. It takes time and patience. You can read my previous posts on my general routine here and here. I still do pretty much everything there but I do not use the brush anymore and I have some newer, better products. Let me know in the comments if you’d like a detailed updated routine.

I’ve spent the past few years doing research and trying out different products. My intention is not to add thick-super strong holding products. I want her hair manageable and as frizz free as possible. Her hair is not kinky-and though she had more of the bottle-curls when she was younger, Continue reading